Parents we have worked with in the past and currently have informed us that they just cannot get their child to clean up his or her toys when done playing. Their children move to the next toy or activity and leave what they were engaged with behind. The result being, parents end up cleaning up the toys, or get in a back and forth battle trying to get their child to clean up.
Prior to assisting parents with this issue, we ask the parent how is the response effort? Meaning how much effort does it take your child to engage in the behavior. The more effort it takes the least likely your child will engage in the expected behavior. People typically avoid or stop engaging in behaviors that are difficult for them to complete. For example, you ask your child to clean at least 20 toys spread across the bedroom floor. Your child will probably start by cleaning up some of the toys, but may stop because the number of toys may be too much to clean up. So, it is important to know whether the demand being presented is too high for your child. Don’t worry, we aren’t asking you to stop having your child clean up all of the toys, we are only making you aware that this is a behavior that does occur. We will provide you with strategies to help you combat this issue.
The goal is to teach your child to clean up when done with each toy or activity, rather than when it is time to stop playing. Your child should play, put away, and play again. This is the process that will alleviate the response effort. We want to have your child successfully clean and want to clean.
So, start with engaging in an activity with your child. For instance, building blocks. When you both are done building blocks, start with putting some of the blocks away for your child. Then, have your child finish putting the rest of the blocks away. Deliver lots of praise for your child putting the blocks away. Deliver praise while your child is cleaning up NOT at the end. We want to encourage the cleaning response, and keep your child motivated throughout. Praise helps with this.
Once your child consistently helps you clean up at the end of each activity for at least 3 consecutive days, have your child now work on cleaning up the entire activity independently. We will use the block example. Your child is engaged with block play with you present. You do not have to be actively engaged. When it is time for your child to clean up, do not assist. As your child begins to put blocks away deliver praise. If you determine that the response effort may be too hard when you try this strategy, feel free to help your child complete some of the activity by putting away a few blocks while delivering praise to your child. If after a few blocks are put away with assistance your child is motivated, fade back your assistance and continue to deliver praise for your child cleaning up the blocks independently.
At times, your child may rely on your assistance or may lose motivation in cleaning up, so assisting for a predetermined amount of toys or time can help increase motivation. However, it is important that you fade out that assistance, and allow your child the opportunity to clean up independently. At the end of cleaning up, have your child earn a special reward, or present the option to engage in continued toy play. Once your child cleans up with you monitoring, and without the need for assistance for at least 3 days, fade out monitoring. You can periodically go in and check to see if your child continues to clean up without you present.
It is important that when teaching cleaning that you remain consistent, and always deliver praise when your child is emitting skills that are not typically done on their own. This again will help with motivation, and maintain the expected behavior over time. Your child may forget to clean up a toy. That is okay. Remind your child to clean up the toys when if left out. Following reminding your child, have him or her then go clean up the toys. Always remember when cleaning consistency is key.
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